Dementia and memories

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  • If I get dementia, I want my family and friends to embrace my reality.
  • If I get dementia and I am not sure who you are do not take it personally.
    My timeline is confusing to me.
  • If I get dementia don’t argue with me about what is true for me versus what is true for you.
  • If I get dementia and can no longer use a knife and fork do not start feeding me. Instead switch me to finger food and see if I can still feed myself.
  • If I get dementia and I am sad or anxious hold my hand and listen.
    Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded.
  • If I get dementia I do not want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like an adult.
  • If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the thing that I have always enjoyed.
    Help me find a way to exercise, read and visit with family and friends.
  • If I get dementia, ask me to tell a story from the past.
  • If I get dementia and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
  • If I get dementia treat me the way you would like to be treated.
  • If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me. Every now and then, if I don’t eat, I get angry and may have trouble explaining what I need.
  • If I get dementia don’t talk about me as if I am not in the room.
  • If I get dementia do not feel guilty if you cannot care fo me 24/7.
    It is not your fault, and you have done your best. Find someone who can help you or choose a great new place for me to live.
  • If I get dementia and I live in a dementia care home, please visit me often.
  • If I get dementia do not get frustrated if I mix up names, events or places.
    Take a deep breath, it is not my fault.
  • If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favorite music playing.
  • If I get dementia and like to pick up items and carry them around help me return these items to their original place.
  • If I get dementia do not exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
  • If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs and kisses.
  • If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.
  • If I think my husband/wife is still alive, or if I think I am visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I will feel much happier.

When you meet me, always introduce yourself and never ask, “Who I am?”
This causes anxiety.

JHH 21/07/2025